As my horrible football gambling season continues, I will do my best to get back into the black by closing my eyes and throwing darts at a copy of football prospectus. Here are my five most likely misguided choices.
Cleveland +3 over Cincinnati:
Cleveland is a mostly bad team. The good things they do can win them games against other bad teams and Cincinnati is one of those bad teams. Trent Richardson will see the ball a lot and Cincinnati will wear down against the reasonably good Cleveland O-line. Also Andy Dalton is a ginger who kind of looks like Landry from Friday Night Lights…so there is that.
Baltimore -3 over Dallas
I don’t know what to think about Dallas as a whole, they are a jeckel and hyde team. I do know that the Ravens at home should beat the Cowboys by more than three. Plus the Ryan brothers are in competition to see who gets fired first.
Philly -3 over Detroit
Detroit is a bad team, Philly is a bad team. Andy Reid is a good bad coach, Jim Schwartz is just bad*. Yes I said it Lions fans. Your beloved coach who took you to the playoffs isn’t any good. Your MVP(Kevin Smith) in the first two games has not seen a snap in the 2nd two games. Brandon Pettigrew should not be in the NFL but Tony Scheffler sits. Matt Stafford looks like a latter-day Joey Harrington because he gets no protection. And the Lions D is fucking horrible.
Arizona -5 over Buffalo
I believe in Arizona and I believe that Kevin Kolb is better than Ryan Fitzpatrick and his noodle arm. The heat is going to get to Buffalo and Larry Fitz is going to be the best Fitz today.
New York Giants +7 over San Fran
This is the classic Vegas knows that the public is on board for San Fran as the best team in football and the Giants inspire no confidence during this part of the season. With that said, The Giants will get up for this game, and I don’t see San Fran winning by more than three. I have doubled down on this one by picking the Giants on the line and +7. But I am terrible at this so don’t listen to me.
*Love it when your coach throws his center under the bus because of a mistake in the waning minutes of the Tennessee game, when the Tennessee game was lost by a multitude of blow coverages, special teams mistakes and poor clock management. Fuck Jim Schwartz, he is a gutless punk, I now know why Harbaugh owned him so badly. He’s in his head. Lions fans should be counting the days to his dismissal.